I am writing this post for Valentine’s Day which is an annual festival to celebrate romantic love, friendship and admiration. Every year on 14 February people celebrate this day by sending messages of love and affection to partners, family and friends. Every person may have individual experiences of unconditional love and attachment. It can be wrong to pressure yourself to find true love; if you have yet to experience a genuine connection with another person or feel a sense of comfort with them. The song koi sone ke dilwala, koi chandi ke dilwala implies that love is fragile, it isn’t strong.

कोई सोने के दिलवाला कोई चांदी के दिलवाला,
शीशे का है मतवाले तेरा दिल,
महफ़िल ये नहीं तेरी दीवाने कहीं चल.

There’s someone who’s heart of gold, some other’s heart is of silver, my heart is of glass (fragile). This song is shot in a party. The hero of the song says this party does not belong to him he consoles himself by saying dear crazy mind let’s move on. Lyricist Majhrooh Sultanpuri wrote this song for film Maya (1961) sung by the great Mohamed Rafisab, composed by Salil Chowdhary and filmed on Dev Anand. This is one of the superhit songs and remains timeless. This song will never die. Generations will listen to it. Long live Mohd. Rafi Sab.

Sone ke dilwala means someone who is exceptionally kind, generous, and compassionate, someone who is loyal with a willingness to help others without expecting anything in return.  And, silver hearts represent a romantic heart, someone who is deeply in love with something, or a person. A heart of glass means someone who is easily hurt or emotionally fragile, like glass which can break easily, suggesting that their feelings can be shattered quickly by a minor setback, one who gets disappointed; it describes a person who is highly sensitive and prone to emotional pain. 

While many would ideally choose “heart” over “money,” in reality, when faced with a difficult decision between following one’s passion (love) or pursuing financial stability, people often tend to prioritize money due to the practical need for security and necessities, even if it means sacrificing the love of his/her life.

The word love has depth.  We don’t love easily. Love is not a universal experience; some   people might feel an immediate attraction as falling in love quickly, for others, developing deep love takes time and getting to know someone well. This means there’s no single answer to whether someone “gets love easily” as it varies greatly from person to person depending on factors like inner personality, character, outer personality, intelligence, earnings, attachment styles, and life experiences. 

Every person who falls in love experiences variety of pains and pleasures of love. Each person has his/her own character and personality; they have different backgrounds and conditions. So, there is no set of rules that applies equally to everyone. Also, whom a person dates also is a matter of personal choice. No one has any right to intrude in anybody’s private affair. The youngsters say, not even their parents have any rights.  But our heart and gut do give us signals about the right or the wrong person. Do we hear to the signals?

Because people often lose all objectivity when they fall in love, it is said ‘Love is blind’.  The song koi sone ke dilwala, koi chandi ke dilawala’s last stanza says that this party isn’t really my vibe, I think it’s time to head out because I am not enjoying it any longer. I should get out of here.  This means the hero feels like he doesn’t belong to that gathering, and it would be better to leave and seek out a different social environment that aligns more with his interests or personality.

How a person experiences pain is unique to each one. Attraction and affection don’t stay the same, and love can feel different for each person. Love too has a lifecycle – introduction, development, growth, maturity and in some cases decline. A person may experience and express love differently from another person. Some people have intense feelings that they are unafraid to express, while others take time to open or prefer to show love in subtler ways.

Also, people demonstrate their love for others in various ways. Whether through acts of service, physical touch, quality time, words of affirmation, gift-giving, acts of kindness, sacrifice, or support, the key is to find the expression that resonates most with your loved ones. Essentially, “everyone’s pain is different”, “everyone’s experience of love is different”. Listen to this beautiful song.  Happy Valentines Day!